The Fat Tire Boys                                                      Scootergoods Homepage

"Capt." Scottys Chuckwagon   Brother John    Chopper Nation  Chickenman "Conklin"
HD Gene & ILene Jaebird "Miss Behavin'" N.Y.C. Irish Scootergoods
Long Island New York
 
Ridge Runner, Beckie & Dave - O   Charlie W. & Chapdawg
Scrappy & Monkey   2 Dog Joe Crazy Bastid Beancan Scooter Ted

September 2009
CHOPPER NATION

It’s always been our motto here at chopper nation to hand out shit and we usually don’t Cut anybody any slack, but we’d like to take a minute to give our condolences to Bruce Rossmeyer’s family and friends. It’s a tragic loss to bikers everywhere and we will missHim. There have been a few accidents this summer, some could have been avoided and some not. Strangers to the biker world might wonder why we give the biker hug every time we see each other, it’s because we never know when it will be the last time we see that person. Cages don’t seem to see us and don’t care if they run us off the road. Between the ghost deer and very real armadillos, we have to stay on our toes every second we’re on the road. Happy birthday again to the other half of chopper nation gorilla joe…damn yer old!! His B-day party this year was little more tame than last years silverback run but a blast just the same. We’re all looking forward to Gunstock coming up holloween weekend with David Allen Coe headlining. J.O. Batten always shows the biker community how it’s done in style and this event won’t let anybody down. Chopper Nation will definetly be there showing our support and lending a hand as always. This is where we usually start giving everybody shit but as I go on runs year after year I see much more diverse variety of bikes and riders and ya know I kinda like it! Women riders, feeling the wind and the freedom of riding their own scoots. Big assed valkyries, baggers and bikes I don’t even know who makes the damn thing, but I’m glad their out there and I for one am proud to ride with them. None of the sons of bitches ever brings chopper nation beer or food though, whats up with that? Gorilla joe and I are gonna start taking inventory of just what them baggers carry in them bags cuz there ain’t never any food in there. Rain gear maybe? ( pussies!) Ride safe, no skool and their ropper still sucks…….the Fat Tire Boys

May 2009
It’s fu----  may already? Werent we all just saying happy holidays? Shit!  Everything is going great at the nation, riding when we get a chance.Keeping those choppers running and keeping parts from falling of those Rigid frames seems to be a full time job lately. But it’s all good, like I Always say once you go chopper you never go back. The nation is getting Ready for The Old School Biker Rodeo coming up just after this issue Hits the streets. Look for us in the burnout pit after the bike games finish On Saturday.  Myself, Gorilla Joe and his little brother Daniel on his busa Smoked the place out last year and we’re gonna do it again so it’s something You don’t want to miss. It would be nice to see some baggers represent This year but their either scared or worried they will get smoke stains on Their luggage racks, I dunno. Maybe they can ask permission from their Old ladies.  All we hear lately are Bobbers with really skinny tires Are making a comeback and that the fat tire boys are old news. Maybe we Can get one of those dudes in the burnout pit but I doubt it. Meanwhile The fat tire boys represent everytime we roll out of the garage. Big motors, Big tires and big fat heads……that’s how we roll at the nation. Look for us And say hey, we love the attention……and buy us a beer  while yer at it. A sandwich would be cool too…... The Fat Tire Boys

  APRIL 2009
Chopper Nation (Chronicals of the Fat Tire Boys)

Here we are another month has gone and alot of things happening. Ken at the Pits Lounge in Brooksville put on a kickin’ biker party Sunday, March 1st with free food. Heard this one was a big hit even though I was told that some of the ‘retard’ rejects came down and just helped themselves to about 4 or 5 plates of food to take back to their hang-out. We here at the Nation would like to give a BIG welcome our newest member of the fat tire club Injun Joe with his new fat tire bike! Welcome to the dark side! And besides how can you go wrong with a name like Joe? Now me & Chopper Chip have noticed in the mag that everyone is jumping on the Chopper Nation express and that’s ok because we know were cool, we have choppers and you want to be like us... Its ok, we don’t mind. We know that you have to put us in your articles so people will read it. OK, now lets see who have I left out... Oh yeah (no skool) choppers .. If you have noticed they have come out with a ‘so we call it a rhopper’ This is their new and improved Chopper! Looks like a rice buner gone wrong. Now I see where that blood & sweat and lots of beers saying of his comes from. Because he drinks too many beers from sweating, and he gets bloody from trying to build those tonka toy bikes! Sorry No Skool, I know we had a agreement not to pick at each other, but you just make it too damn easy! Now we all know its getting close for the 5th Old School Biker Rodeo, put on by the DD214 Foundation to help support our disabled Vets. So come on out the 8th & 9th of May to what we the locals around here call HOBO village, and show your support. And we don’t want to hear about how much money ya’ll spent over in Daytona, you shouldn’t have went over their anyway because its over-rated... You sure won’t find a beer 4 a buck, and the money doesn’t go to a good cause. It goes to the pockets of the rich. Enough said ride it like you stole it and always remember... Swing Arms are for Sissies.   P.S and sissy bars don’t belong on choppers!!!!!      the fat tire boys

                                                                               MARCH 2009
CHOPPER NATION This month I would like everyone who reads this article to take a moment of silence for one of my good bros and also my family member Bart Beck, those who knew him called him (Bart-man) he will be greatly missed by us all. Now may he rest in peace with all our brothers, sisters and God up above. It was not a motorcycle accident that took him, he was in the hospital sick and passed away of complications, but still the same. Another bro gone.... Now that’s said.... Lets get on to the reason people say that they actually read the chopper nation articles that we, (the fat tire boys) are writing about in Scootergoods Mag... This is something I would never think about saying, but the only idiots you hear about doing stupid shit like what I’m about to tell is those crotch rocket riders. So I’m driving down the road going to work in my (cage), I was next to another cage when this dumb-ass decides to go right between us like a bat out of hell on not a ricer but a Harley! Now can’t speak for everybody... but that pissed me off! Now here we are in a day and time that THE MAN is looking for anything he can do to shut us down and take away our rights as motorcycle riders, so why give them a reason? Never thought I would be saying this about another biker, but people like that- I don’t consider a biker, they’re just another idiot poser. Well Chopper Chip, you know I have to do it before anyone else does.... but what the HELL is up with that sissy bar on your chopper ?! For those of you that don’t believe it, I might need some help trying to catch it on a photo so we can have some evidence!! Chip, don’t you know that sissy bars are for sissies? Wait till those guys in (no skool) hear about this they’re going to try recruiting you as a prospect. Speaking of no school.. Haven’t heard much from those guys he must have washed the (sportster) oops! I mean chopper... keep forgetting . Now Scrappy, you know whenever you wash that damn thing it breaks down!!!!. Well enough said, ride it till she blows (the fat tire boys)P.S would like to give a shout out to the Big Ragoo to see if his panties are still in a wadd. Haven’t heard from him since I wrote the article on the Captain Morgan Sauce.

CHOPPER NATION

“ODE TO MY CHOPPER”

Flashy paint, chrome and stainless steel

Being an ugly cuss it’s my only sex appeal

Cruzin down the road lookin like peter fonda

Got my shades on lookin tough, this here aint no Honda

Tattoos, a beard and nasty armpit hair

French kissed a frog once simply on a dare.

I loves my chopper baby, it’s got class an style,

I just scrape the bugs off my face and cruise for awhile.

They’s all different kinds of them choppers we know

Back tires big ‘an fat, stealin the show.

Them bagger dudes jus don’t understand ‘bout a mans chopper

They snicker ‘an point ‘an call it a bar hopper

They’s got bags an windshields an skinny back tires

I’d rather yank on my nads with some vice grip pliers

Yeah baby there’s room for you, just sit on the fender

My buddies are all gazing while i pay the bartender

Cuz choppers is what all them chicks dig

An i just wanna see their boobs what a pig!

Twelve beers, six yager bombs an their all looking good

Checking out titties like a chopper dude should.

So don’t be a hater we’ve heard quite enough

Be a chopper dudes friend and carry our stuff.

February 2009
CHOPPER NATION

So yer cruzin down the road thinking "damn I look good on my chopper today"When bam! A bug hits you right in the teeth when your grinning because, You know your stylin on your cool shiny machine. Do you think to yourself,"self, I gotta get me a bagger with a windshield" Nope, you suck it up like a chopper dude should and swallow that sucker, lick the guts off your front teeth and then think to yourself ya gotta kiss your old lady right away and share. Then you can snicker to yourself next time she makes that damn liver and onions you hate. And ya ever notice bagger dudes never pay any attention to their rear tires? They look down and kick‘em once in a while to make sure their still there and have air in them. A chopper dude pats his rear tire like he does his old ladys butt. It’s big and plump, to be admired and appreciated. Sure they can carry stuff in their huge leather bags strapped to their bikes and never ever let ya forget that they can stuff a weeks worth of laundry in there. A chopper dude is just thinking their trying to hide their weenie rear tires. Now if they would stuff some damn food in there I could see the purpose. When we go on a run ,I hear complaining about nobody ever feeding us, (ok, that’s usually me) and when are we gonna stop for lunch? I’ve never seen a bagger dude reach in one of those damn bags and pull out a chuck roast. Just what the hell do you have to carry that’s so important you cant make room for a picnic basket? And speaking of food, I think I can speak for all of us when I say we’re gonna miss the Crossroads bar and grill. I’m gonna miss meeting Gorilla Joe up there on Saturday mornings and having Laurie cook us up a great breakfast, shooting the shit with everybody and drinking coffee. It was a great place to meet up before runs and a local landmark and I for one am gonna miss the place. Chopper Nation hopes everybody had a great holiday season and will be looking forward to the new year. The Fat Tire Boys

January 2009
CHOPPER NATION
Here we are another year come and gone hope this year is better for us then the last one now to them (No Skool) Choppers what can you really say about them,they have a girl for a president so no one can beat Scrappy up. Maybe she can come to the next rodeo and do a burn out since Scrappy doesn’t show up. He rides a factory built sportster that he calls a chopper that he says he built . But the only thing chopper on that bike is the chains he had to chop to put on for his shocks. They had to recruit a real chopper guy in their little group just so they could win some bike shows and make them look better so don’t be a hater. and chopper nation would like to know where its written that choppers have to be built not bought don’t know about yours but I think somebody did build my chopper guess that why they call you (no skool) on another note would like to give a ata biker to Chickenman for the smoke out he had out in Weeki Wachee lot of bikers showed and the Apple Dumpling Gang. Lots of good food as always but still gona drop that panhead from the crane at the next rodeo. Now that the cold weather is here well be seeing everybody hiding behind their windshields, maybe you bagger dudes can get heaters installed along with your stereos, arm rests and luggage racks. You know chopper nation has a lot of fun picking on everybody . We try not to leave anyone out so if we haven’t picked on you lately just let us know and we’ll make sure and throw some insults your way. The toy run for the hernando sherrifs was a big success and we were proud to be a part of it .we sincerely wish everybody a great holiday season! Long live chopper nation and always remember Swingarms are for Sissys
"Gorilla Joe & Chopper Chip The Original Fat Tire Boys"

 

pg4.jpg (58846 bytes) pg2.jpg (39692 bytes) pg3.jpg (41999 bytes) pg1.jpg (51503 bytes)


December 2008

So everyone HAS has to talk about the rodeo and all I can say is DAMN!! Did you see the Fat Tire Boys and the rice burner in the burn-out pit? Hell yeah!! My lil bro and Chopper Nation had to show the rest of you bikers how it is done. Speaking of, did any of you see those sissy Old Skool Chopper boys around? NO? Me neither. All I can figure is that it must’ve been cuz their little wee’s wee’s were hurting!! But back to the rodeo.. There is no doubt that we had a damn good time, as always! A special thank you goes out to J.O Batten, of course. Because without him, there wouldn’t be a rodeo and we wouldn’t be able to do all of this. But most of all, the biggest thank you goes to our girl Kristy, who brought us Robert Morris, attorney at law, in which fought, damn proudly four our right to party and proved that WE DO still have rights. And to the staff. A big HELL YEAH to those who volunteered their time and worked their asses off to make sure all went off without a hitch. But the reward of helping our disabled veterans make the work all worth while!! To all of those who joined our ‘party in the pasture’, I don’t think that any of us could thank you enough for all of your support and dedication, and help in keeping the rodeo a safe and awesome event. Oh yeah, and keeping the place clean means alot, too. Couldn’t have survived the weekend without Captain Scotty and Eileen, I think we would have starved to death without them. Captain Scotty, you make the best damn ribs and sauce I have ever tasted, and Eileen you are always there when we need ya, babe. Thanks!! Now if we could just keep the ‘Big Ragoo’ off the captain, then I think the bike games would go alot faster, but as always, our Pirate and Turtle does a KICK ASS job and keeps it rollin’! Til next time, Burn it til your back tire blows!! Gorrilla Joe and Chopper Chip Chopper Nation
P.S. Chickman better keep that panunder lock and key, for it may be the next victim of the bike-drop!


SMOKIN' AT THE RODEO Halloween 2008
So everyone HAS has to talk about the rodeo and all I can say is DAMN!! Did you see the Fat Tire Boys and the rice burner in the burn-out pit? Hell yeah!! My lil bro and Chopper Nation had to show the rest of you bikers how it is done. Speaking of, did any of you see those sissy Old Skool Chopper boys around? NO? Me neither. All I can figure is that it must’ve been cuz their little wee’s wee’s were hurting!! But back to the rodeo.. There is no doubt that we had a damn good time, as always! A special thank you goes out to J.O Batten, of course. Because without him, there wouldn’t be a rodeo and we wouldn’t be able to do all of this. But most of all, the biggest thank you goes to our girl Kristy, who brought us Robert Morris, attorney at law, in which fought, damn proudly four our right to party and proved that WE DO still have rights. And to the staff. A big HELL YEAH to those who volunterred their time and worked their asses off to make sure all went off without a hitch. But the reward of helping our disabled veterans make the work all worth while!! To all of those who joined our ‘party in the pasture’, I don’t think that any of us could thank you enough for all of your support and dedication, and help in keeping the rodeo a safe and awesome event. Oh yeah, and keeping the place clean means alot, too. Couldn’t have survived the weekend without Captain Scotty and Eileen, I think we would have starved to death without them. Captain Scotty, you make the best damn ribs and sauce I have ever tasted, and Eileen you are always there when we need ya, babe. Thanks!! Now if we could just keep the ‘Big Ragoo’ off the captain, then I think the bike games would go alot faster, but as always, our Pirate and Turtle does a KICK ASS job and keeps it rollin’! Til next time, Burn it til your back tire blows!! Gorrilla Joe and Chopper Chip Chopper Nation
P.S. Chickenman better keep that pan under lock and key, for it may be the next victim of the bike-drop!

 

IT WAS ON ! IN THE PASTURE JUNE 13th. As the crazy BASTIDS from Scootergoods 
and the Chopper Nation had some fun! MATTRESS RACIN'      

MAT1.jpg (107897 bytes) MAT2.jpg (58890 bytes) MAT3.jpg (26653 bytes)
MAT4.jpg (59628 bytes) MAT5.jpg (57822 bytes)

SEE VIDEO

MAT6.jpg (61732 bytes)

October 2008
CHOPPER NATION
Ya know its hard to come up with shit to write about every month. The time goes by so fast and most weekends are a blur, with time going by even faster than on the weekdays. Most writers go to events and say what a great time they had, the beer was cold, the band was great, blah blah blah. Screw that kind of writing, it’s always a good time with us so that’s a given. I don’t know about my partner Gorilla Joe but I’m a people watcher. Actually he doesn’t say a whole lot, a man of few words but when he talks people listen cuz its not gonna be stupid shit like a lot of people. Plus he’s a monster of a dude so its great havin him around. I like to watch people, nothing is cooler than a shit load of bikers in one place. I feel at home, around people who think like I do, work like hell during the week like I do, and are fiercly Patriotic like I am. You won’t hear any liberal bullshit about how great Hillary is, no pansy assed talk about giving all the illegals drivers licenses. We’ve been seeing a lot more of those scooters on the road lately and I’m not sure what category to put them in. be here soon and when we head over we need some baggers with us to carry our shit so let us know if your going over. Where’s uncle bill when we need him? That man has some serious samsonite strapped to his ride, he can fit a midget in his tour pack alone.They wave at me like "hey Im a biker too!" mostly I just stare at them not knowing what to do. Pretty soon there will be packs of them running around, swilling diet cokes and Bragging about their gas mileage. I swear to god if I see one with fringe dangling from their grips I’m gonna run the bastard over. We’ve been staying away from theYager bombs thank you, somebody was gonna wind up in the hospital or pregnant I’m not sure which is worse at our age but I know that shit will make you crazy. Biketoberfest is gonna Haven’t seen much of Don V lately, he’s always off on one charity event or another doin’ what a good Editor should do. It’s hard for Chopper Nation to keep up with everything going on so we Don’t even try, we just do whatever we feel like. J.O. Battons birthday is coming up and although he busts our chops every chance he gets and rides a rolling barka lounger and never carries anything for us except our trophies which he takes home, we will be partying biker style with titties and beer! Apparently deer are hanging out in the middle of the roads these days so according to Capt. Scotty so RIDE SAFE, til next month, "The Fat Tire Boys"

September 2008
CHOPPER NATION (Tales of the Fat Tire Boys)Who the hell invented those damn yager bombs? I’d like to kick their ass.I’ve always been a beer drinker mind ya, but we get started on those damn things and I forget where the hell I am and what I was doing, I just wanna play with everybodys belly button. About fifteen bikes rolled out of Crossroads for the Silver Back run and I’m not sure how many survived. One thing I do know is my buddy Gorilla Joe had a birthday he’ll never forget!
Saturday Aug. 16th we rode up to Macs Place for a chicken cook off with our very own Capt. Scotty cookin up some of his Awesome chicken. He also had ribs, pork tenderloin and turkey legs.Chopper Nation appreciates it when people feed us and are instant friends of ours. Free beer would be great too but I think that’s probably pushing it. We’ve got some great events coming up in the next few months with Spooks & Scoots, the 4th Biker Rodeo and the Cotee River Bike Fest. We’ll be covering those events with our unique perspective and if you see us give a shout we love the attention.
Til then, "The Fat Tire Boys"

AUGUST 2008
Damn the rain! I know we need it and all that shit, it just needs to quit so’s we can get out there and ride! Yeah yeah I know, a little rain shouldn’t and wouldn’t stop real bikers, well lemme tell ya I been rained on every time I go out lately and it gets old! Soggy assed jeans and wet boots Make me irritable. Congrats to Don V on the 4th anniversary of Scootergoods, and the whole crew. The mag is growing and Chopper Nation is proud to be a part of it. On Sat. Aug. 9th we’re celebrating Gorilla Joe’s 40th birthday, we’re calling it the silver back tittie bar run. We’re meeting at Crossroads Brooksville starting at ten for breakfast, leaving out around noon and heading to Lollipops, Calendar Girls and Players Club. We’ve got drink specials set up with the management so it shouldn’t be too hard on the wallet. After raising hell at those places its off to Cotee River Saloon for the Poor Mans Sturgis Party with Pirate, Turtle and The Big Ragoo emceeing. Don is hauling the cooker there so I know there will be some great food when we arrive. Chopper Nation would like to send congrats to Scrappy and Monkey (Jimmy & M arnae) on becoming part of the Scootergoods family. No Skool Choppers rule!! Chopper Nation has been going to Citrus Motor Speedway to watch our goodFriend and fellow rider Wes Filyaw race in the mini stock division. We head up There most Saturdays so if you can make it, he could use our support. Im Also selling sponsorships for the race car, we’ve got Coney Hot Dog, thanks Blair! And a few other sponsors now and we’re trying to make it a go. If you’d Like more info on becoming a sponsor, give me a call, 352-397-5950Thanks…..Chopper Chip & Gorilla Joe
"THE FAT TIRE BOYS" 

                                                                                

                                                                          A word to Chopper Nation
        Your May article talks about real bikers are not to look like models in a catalog, but yet every time I see one of them he looks like one of the Chip-n-dale dancers. I also noticed one of those so called choppers came to the rodeo on a trailer. It was like a princess on a float at a homecoming parade. It was called " OLD SKOOL RODEO" not " NEW SKOOL FASHION SHOW". Real choppers are built out of blood, sweat, and alot of beer not bought. Don't get me wrong I like to look at the fancy paint, it's the only way to tell them apart. My chopper is one of a kind, you might be the Fat Tire Boys, but you should not be called Chopper Nation until you build one from nothing.
                                                                                      NO SKOOL CHOPPERS

REBUTTAL
First off I’d like to say what kind of pussy writes an anonymous email likethat? If your gonna talk shit to the big boys have the balls to own up,ok?  If you knew anything about me then you’d know my tire was bald going into the rodeo, I had been trying to save it for the burnout pit. After TWO good burnouts I knew it wouldn’t be road worthy, hence the trailer. It actually had large chunks gone and it was burnt down to the cords when I was done in the pit. Second, I cant understand why you old timers insist only choppers should be home built. You didn’t build the NEW bagger you probably ride Mr.“old school” why do you single out choppers?As for the personal attack on my appearance, I’m out there every weekend riding with the group and we can step out back and I can teach you some respect anytime anywhere. Just for the record I’m kinda wondering why you’d be looking at guys that way, maybe I’ll let ya ride bitch around the block on a real chopper sometime. Send your old lady over to chopper nation and we’ll send her back with a smile on her face, cuz you probably aren’t taking care of business at home.

 

 

June 2008


Chopper Nation: We went to the 3rd Old School Biker Rodeo "Old School Style"!!! What a weekend Tits, Beer & Bikes,what more could Ya ask for? The Burn out pit was a huge success, alot of scooterheads left some of thier tire in the pit.From 4 wheelers to golf carts the action was non stop. There was only 2 fat tire
boys in the pit. Guess some of those choppers out ther are just for show. The bike games where a blast! Chopper Nation had alot of fun pulling them Schitthouses,which came fully equiped with with beatiful women with even prettier titties. Chopper Chip needs a lot of parctice for the Oct. 31st Rodeo,so he can try to beat me in the keg push. I kicked ass in that one, I took 2nd and did not even practice at home like some others out there. (you know who you are) What I would like to know is why was there only 3 choppers in the bike games? Guess that’s why it’s cool to be a "fat tire boy",all the women love ya and all the men hate ya! But give them bagger there props,if it was’nt for them we chopper boys would’nt have any place to carry our ole ladies t- backs. Hope you all had a blst at the 3rd rodeo and don’t forgret to come support Our Disabled Vets on Oct. 31st 2008. Lets make the next 1 even bigger! Choppers Rule and remember "SWINGARMS ARE FOR SISSIES"!!!
                        Gorrilla Joe & Chopper Chip (The original Fat tire Boys)


May 2008 
Its finally started to warm up a bit and I think we can all pack away those chaps and long johns. Gonna miss chaps though, i like the way they frame a womans ass. Still got all my fingers, no frostbite this year cuz im too stubborn to wear gloves. Just like every year we’ll be seeing a lot of new bikes and faces. Now all of us were rookies at one time or another but as scooter heads its in our blood and we started riding at an early age. I couldn’t imagine being an adult and just getting started riding. Anyway chopper nation, always being nice guys are willing to give rookies a few tips. Your new harley shirt should not have a collar, and just because your on a harley now don’t start calling everybody “bro”. If you forget to put your feet down at a stoplight make sure your really drunk first. Fringe is not a mandatory item on all your leathers and never ever order a cappuccino at a biker bar. Real bikers don’t look like the models in the catalogs ya been reading so don’t be scared. A wristpin isn’t biker jewelry and don’t put “badass” stickers on your new bell helmet. I don’t even wanna go there people. “Harley hair” isn’t a style ya get at the salon ya gotta earn it and your tattoos shouldn’t wash off. Your trailer shouldn’t have more miles on it than your bike, ride the damn thing to Daytona. “Dawg” is a term of endearment, their not talking about the yorkie ya got at home. Those penny loafers you like so much aren’t gonna hack it, get some boots and never refer to your scoot as a “toy” their not toys their our lifestyle. And finally yer gonna need saddlebags in case one of us chopper guys needs some storage space. ‘Nuf said, Chopper Chip & Gorilla Joe

March 2008
CHOPPER NATION
"Further Chronicles of the FAT TIRE BOYS"
Alright people we gotta talk about where these biker events are being held. The Chopper Nation was recently at The Dead Wood Fest and well represented I might add. The problem is dirt roads, lime rock roads, whatever you wanna call them. Dirt to a chopper guy is like a veggie burger to a fat chick.Cruising into the place I got mud hitting me in the back of the headfrom my damn near fenderless rear tire. Chopper guys were dipping lake water and pouring it over their beloved scoots in a desperate attempt to beat back the muck, it was a horrifying scene. The Brooksville Biker Rodeo is a little more chopper guy friendly as the road going in is a little shorter and the pasture is always covered in grass. What we’re gonna need from now on if these events held in the middle of nowhere is a paved lane maybe the width of a sidewalk, or topless girls waiting to wash our scoots as soon as we get there. The dresser guys can hold their wash buckets for them if they wanna look. Now that we’ve got that settled I’d like to thank J.O. for carrying my trophy home for me, I actually haven’t seen it since I tried to tie it to his sissybar. Last I heard he was dragging it down Hwy 41 behind his bike. Word is he’s trying to get a burnout pit put in for the next rodeo. I’d like to say here and now this chopper guy will definatly represent. It will also give all that testosterone flying around a place to be vented. You wanna fly across the pasture endangering everybody? Get your ass in the pit and lets see what you can do! I’d like to throw out a special chopper guy salute to Capt. Scotty for always taking care of our stomachs, when he cooks I’m usually first in line. And my buddy Ted who is now an honorary member in the fat tire club. Ride safe, Chopper Chip & Gorilla Joe

The Original "FAT TIRE BOYS"

February 2008
We at chopper nation would like to take a minute off of our Favorite subject, which is anything chopper related and talk to Cage Drivers. Now we know most of ‘em don’t read biker rags but some of them do and they can talk amongst themselves to get the word out. We would like it very much if they would not run us over anymore. Now I know it seems to be a hobby for them judging by the numbers, but speaking for chopper guys and all other types of riders too its terribly inconvient getting Crushed and mangled. They seem to think being airlifted to the hospitals a joy ride. How do you cage drivers miss a fat dude on a road king? Hell I can spot one a mile away, and I damn sure wouldn’t want one denting The front end of my truck. We at chopper nation have discussed this problem and we know cage drivers are gonna run SOMETHING over so we think thempreppies on those fancy ten speeds would make great targets. Any grown man that would don a helmet that ugly and wear spandex doesn’t do chopper Guys any good anyways. They don’t go as fast as us so them little old ladies with Slow reactions can get in on the fun too. We’ll be waiting for your response, you can reach us at
www.scootergoods.com "The Fat Tire Boys"

Rebuttle to the "FAT TIRE BOYS" February 2008

Yes they do! Choppers look cool,and the dudes that ride them do so for that exact reason. They to think they are cool. NO FRONT FENDER, NO WINDSHIELDS, NO BAGS. The only problem is it takes 4 or 5 support bikes for each one on a ride. Hey man? Can you carry my leathers cause it’s hot and I don’t have bags. Or let’s get beer and oysters but you will have to carry them for me. They talk schitt about SWINGARMS ARE FOR SISSY’S but are the only ones to complain their ass and back are hurting everytime we stop.Hell they have even asked us to carry a T-Back they just bought for their Ole Lady, cause they just ain’t got no room. Next they will be wanting us to carry their bitches cause P-Pads don’t look cool, and they don’t want to scratch their dam fender. So from now on all the Baggers will be hauling their crap plus cheese and crackers to go with them Chopper Riders Whine. "Gunslinger"

 

January 2008
Chopper Nation
Happy NEW YEAR from all of us at Scootergoods and the Chopper Nation! We've seen some very cool customs during the month of December on toy runs. In a sea if dressers which all look alike to us chopper guys, Customs Stand out. They are to be evaluated, scrutinized  and the owners congratulated on a fine scoot. This chopper guys could not tell the difference between a FLHR, Road King, to a FLTR Road Glide. Their rolling Barca Loungers to a chopper dude.Why don't they just slap some wheels on a lazy boy and call it a day. They've got stereos,seats large enough for an elephant,and enough trunk space to pack a months worth of clothes,lights everywhere.ice makers,TV's and all the comforts of home. Hell guys the run this months end is only 100 miles!
And don't even get us at the Chopper Nation started on windshields. You want to hide from bugs,then just keep your ASS at home. They don't taste all that bad, but sometimes they sting a little when they slam into your face at 60 mph. I especially look forward to love bug season. I usally don't have to eat lunch because I ingest enough of them when I ride. We at the chopper nation say grow some balls and buy that sleek pro street that gives you a boner. Better yet join the Chopper Nation we'll be glad to have you.  "The Fat Tire Boys"

December 2007
CHOPPER NATION

If your new to the chopper nation, having purchased or built your shiny new chariot there are a few chopper guy rules that apply to your new found lifestlye. First and most important is that helmets are a no no.They just plain look dumb and when you take them off you got helmet hair. Very uncool. P-pads and passenger seats are also no no’s If the bitch wants a ride that bad she can sit on the fender. A real biker woman wouldn’t mind anyway. She wouldunderstand and appreciate your sense of style. Your gonna have to leave allhat gear you carried around on your FLH, you cant be seen carrying anything more than a do rag. Deal with it. When it rains and everybody else is bundled up real nice in their rain gear and jackets your gonna look like a drowned rat. Hold your head high,your part of the chopper nation. Stop by the pharmacy on the way home and get some nyquil, you’ll be fine AND it’s a pretty good buzz. Chopper guys are minimalists at heart so winter is gonna be especially hard on you. No fluffy lined gloves for you my friend, how ya supposed to pick your nose at stoplights? Them winter boogers are large and nasty, when everybody else is taking off their warm sissy style gloves you’ll already be done picking and ready for that upcoming green light. The word "windshield" shall be forever banned from your vocabulary. A true chopper guy lives to feel the wind.                            "The Fat Tire Boys"

It really doesn’t matter what brand of chopper your on, we’re all kindred spirits, a special breed of biker nobody understands but us. The men and women of CHOPPER NATION

 

mcswine.jpg (12583 bytes) Harlee Mc Swine Approved