The Fat Tire Boys Scootergoods Homepage
September 2009
CHOPPER NATION
It’s always been our motto here at chopper nation to hand out shit and we usually don’t Cut anybody any slack, but we’d like to take a minute to give our condolences to Bruce Rossmeyer’s family and friends. It’s a tragic loss to bikers everywhere and we will missHim. There have been a few accidents this summer, some could have been avoided and some not. Strangers to the biker world might wonder why we give the biker hug every time we see each other, it’s because we never know when it will be the last time we see that person. Cages don’t seem to see us and don’t care if they run us off the road. Between the ghost deer and very real armadillos, we have to stay on our toes every second we’re on the road. Happy birthday again to the other half of chopper nation gorilla joe…damn yer old!! His B-day party this year was little more tame than last years silverback run but a blast just the same. We’re all looking forward to Gunstock coming up holloween weekend with David Allen Coe headlining. J.O. Batten always shows the biker community how it’s done in style and this event won’t let anybody down. Chopper Nation will definetly be there showing our support and lending a hand as always. This is where we usually start giving everybody shit but as I go on runs year after year I see much more diverse variety of bikes and riders and ya know I kinda like it! Women riders, feeling the wind and the freedom of riding their own scoots. Big assed valkyries, baggers and bikes I don’t even know who makes the damn thing, but I’m glad their out there and I for one am proud to ride with them. None of the sons of bitches ever brings chopper nation beer or food though, whats up with that? Gorilla joe and I are gonna start taking inventory of just what them baggers carry in them bags cuz there ain’t never any food in there. Rain gear maybe? ( pussies!) Ride safe, no skool and their ropper still sucks…….the Fat Tire Boys
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May 2009
It’s fu---- may already?
Werent we all just saying happy holidays? Shit! Everything is going great
at the nation, riding when we get a chance.Keeping those choppers running and
keeping parts from falling of those Rigid frames seems to be a full time job
lately. But it’s all good, like I Always say once you go chopper you never go
back. The nation is getting Ready for The Old School Biker Rodeo coming up just
after this issue Hits the streets. Look for us in the burnout pit after the bike
games finish On Saturday. Myself,
Gorilla Joe and his little brother Daniel on his busa Smoked the place out last
year and we’re gonna do it again so it’s something You don’t want to miss.
It would be nice to see some baggers represent This year but their either scared
or worried they will get smoke stains on Their luggage racks, I dunno. Maybe
they can ask permission from their Old ladies.
All we hear lately are Bobbers with really skinny tires Are making a
comeback and that the fat tire boys are old news. Maybe we Can get one of those
dudes in the burnout pit but I doubt it. Meanwhile The fat tire boys represent
everytime we roll out of the garage. Big motors, Big tires and big fat
heads……that’s how we roll at the nation. Look for us And say hey, we love
the attention……and buy us a beer while
yer at it. A sandwich would be cool too…... The Fat Tire Boys
Here we are another month has gone and alot of things happening. Ken at the Pits Lounge in Brooksville put on a kickin’ biker party Sunday, March 1st with free food. Heard this one was a big hit even though I was told that some of the ‘retard’ rejects came down and just helped themselves to about 4 or 5 plates of food to take back to their hang-out. We here at the Nation would like to give a BIG welcome our newest member of the fat tire club Injun Joe with his new fat tire bike! Welcome to the dark side! And besides how can you go wrong with a name like Joe? Now me & Chopper Chip have noticed in the mag that everyone is jumping on the Chopper Nation express and that’s ok because we know were cool, we have choppers and you want to be like us... Its ok, we don’t mind. We know that you have to put us in your articles so people will read it. OK, now lets see who have I left out... Oh yeah (no skool) choppers .. If you have noticed they have come out with a ‘so we call it a rhopper’ This is their new and improved Chopper! Looks like a rice buner gone wrong. Now I see where that blood & sweat and lots of beers saying of his comes from. Because he drinks too many beers from sweating, and he gets bloody from trying to build those tonka toy bikes! Sorry No Skool, I know we had a agreement not to pick at each other, but you just make it too damn easy! Now we all know its getting close for the 5th Old School Biker Rodeo, put on by the DD214 Foundation to help support our disabled Vets. So come on out the 8th & 9th of May to what we the locals around here call HOBO village, and show your support. And we don’t want to hear about how much money ya’ll spent over in Daytona, you shouldn’t have went over their anyway because its over-rated... You sure won’t find a beer 4 a buck, and the money doesn’t go to a good cause. It goes to the pockets of the rich. Enough said ride it like you stole it and always remember... Swing Arms are for Sissies. P.S and sissy bars don’t belong on choppers!!!!! the fat tire boys
MARCH 2009
CHOPPER NATION This month I would like everyone who reads this article to take a
moment of silence for one of my good bros and also my family member Bart Beck,
those who knew him called him (Bart-man) he will be greatly missed by us all.
Now may he rest in peace with all our brothers, sisters and God up above. It was
not a motorcycle accident that took him, he was in the hospital sick and passed
away of complications, but still the same. Another bro gone.... Now that’s
said.... Lets get on to the reason people say that they actually read the
chopper nation articles that we, (the fat tire boys) are writing about in
Scootergoods Mag... This is something I would never think about saying, but the
only idiots you hear about doing stupid shit like what I’m about to tell is
those crotch rocket riders. So I’m driving down the road going to work in my
(cage), I was next to another cage when this dumb-ass decides to go right
between us like a bat out of hell on not a ricer but a Harley! Now can’t speak
for everybody... but that pissed me off! Now here we are in a day and time that
THE MAN is looking for anything he can do to shut us down and take away our
rights as motorcycle riders, so why give them a reason? Never thought I would be
saying this about another biker, but people like that- I don’t consider a
biker, they’re just another idiot poser. Well Chopper Chip, you know I have to
do it before anyone else does.... but what the HELL is up with that sissy bar on
your chopper ?! For those of you that don’t believe it, I might need some help
trying to catch it on a photo so we can have some evidence!! Chip, don’t you
know that sissy bars are for sissies? Wait till those guys in (no skool) hear
about this they’re going to try recruiting you as a prospect. Speaking of no
school.. Haven’t heard much from those guys he must have washed the (sportster)
oops! I mean chopper... keep forgetting . Now Scrappy, you know whenever you
wash that damn thing it breaks down!!!!. Well enough said, ride it till she
blows (the fat tire boys)P.S would like to give a shout out to the Big Ragoo to
see if his panties are still in a wadd. Haven’t heard from him since I wrote
the article on the Captain Morgan Sauce.
CHOPPER NATION
“ODE TO MY CHOPPER”
Flashy paint, chrome and stainless steel
Being an ugly cuss it’s my only sex appeal
Cruzin down the road lookin like peter fonda
Got my shades on lookin tough, this here aint no Honda
Tattoos, a beard and nasty armpit hair
French kissed a frog once simply on a dare.
I loves my chopper baby, it’s got class an style,
I just scrape the bugs off my face and cruise for awhile.
They’s all different kinds of them choppers we know
Back tires big ‘an fat, stealin the show.
Them bagger dudes jus don’t understand ‘bout a mans chopper
They snicker ‘an point ‘an call it a bar hopper
They’s got bags an windshields an skinny back tires
I’d rather yank on my nads with some vice grip pliers
Yeah baby there’s room for you, just sit on the fender
My buddies are all gazing while i pay the bartender
Cuz choppers is what all them chicks dig
An i just wanna see their boobs what a pig!
Twelve beers, six yager bombs an their all looking good
Checking out titties like a chopper dude should.
So don’t be a hater we’ve heard quite enough
Be a chopper dudes friend and carry our stuff.
February 2009
CHOPPER NATION
So yer cruzin down the road thinking "damn I look good on my chopper today"When bam! A bug hits you right in the teeth when your grinning because, You know your stylin on your cool shiny machine. Do you think to yourself,"self, I gotta get me a bagger with a windshield" Nope, you suck it up like a chopper dude should and swallow that sucker, lick the guts off your front teeth and then think to yourself ya gotta kiss your old lady right away and share. Then you can snicker to yourself next time she makes that damn liver and onions you hate. And ya ever notice bagger dudes never pay any attention to their rear tires? They look down and kick‘em once in a while to make sure their still there and have air in them. A chopper dude pats his rear tire like he does his old ladys butt. It’s big and plump, to be admired and appreciated. Sure they can carry stuff in their huge leather bags strapped to their bikes and never ever let ya forget that they can stuff a weeks worth of laundry in there. A chopper dude is just thinking their trying to hide their weenie rear tires. Now if they would stuff some damn food in there I could see the purpose. When we go on a run ,I hear complaining about nobody ever feeding us, (ok, that’s usually me) and when are we gonna stop for lunch? I’ve never seen a bagger dude reach in one of those damn bags and pull out a chuck roast. Just what the hell do you have to carry that’s so important you cant make room for a picnic basket? And speaking of food, I think I can speak for all of us when I say we’re gonna miss the Crossroads bar and grill. I’m gonna miss meeting Gorilla Joe up there on Saturday mornings and having Laurie cook us up a great breakfast, shooting the shit with everybody and drinking coffee. It was a great place to meet up before runs and a local landmark and I for one am gonna miss the place. Chopper Nation hopes everybody had a great holiday season and will be looking forward to the new year. The Fat Tire Boys
January 2009
CHOPPER NATION
Here we are another year come and gone hope this year is better
for us then the last one now to them (No Skool) Choppers what can you really say
about them,they have a girl for a president so no one can beat Scrappy up. Maybe
she can come to the next rodeo and do a burn out since Scrappy doesn’t show
up. He rides a factory built sportster that he calls a chopper that he says he
built . But the only thing chopper on that bike is the chains he had to chop to
put on for his shocks. They had to recruit a real chopper guy in their little
group just so they could win some bike shows and make them look better so don’t
be a hater. and chopper nation would like to know where its written that
choppers have to be built not bought don’t know about yours but I think
somebody did build my chopper guess that why they call you (no skool) on another
note would like to give a ata biker to Chickenman for the smoke out he had out
in Weeki Wachee lot of bikers showed and the Apple Dumpling Gang. Lots of good
food as always but still gona drop that panhead from the crane at the next
rodeo. Now that the cold weather is here well be seeing everybody hiding behind
their windshields, maybe you bagger dudes can get heaters installed along with
your stereos, arm rests and luggage racks. You know chopper nation has a lot of
fun picking on everybody . We try not to leave anyone out so if we haven’t
picked on you lately just let us know and we’ll make sure and throw some
insults your way. The toy run for the hernando sherrifs was a big success and we
were proud to be a part of it .we sincerely wish everybody a great holiday
season! Long live chopper nation and always remember Swingarms are for Sissys
"Gorilla Joe & Chopper Chip The Original Fat Tire Boys"
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December 2008
So everyone HAS has to talk about the rodeo and all I can say is
DAMN!! Did you see the Fat Tire Boys and the rice burner in the burn-out pit?
Hell yeah!! My lil bro and Chopper Nation had to show the rest of you bikers how
it is done. Speaking of, did any of you see those sissy Old Skool Chopper boys
around? NO? Me neither. All I can figure is that it must’ve been cuz their
little wee’s wee’s were hurting!! But back to the rodeo.. There is no doubt
that we had a damn good time, as always! A special thank you goes out to J.O
Batten, of course. Because without him, there wouldn’t be a rodeo and we
wouldn’t be able to do all of this. But most of all, the biggest thank you
goes to our girl Kristy, who brought us Robert Morris, attorney at law, in which
fought, damn proudly four our right to party and proved that WE DO still have
rights. And to the staff. A big HELL YEAH to those who volunteered their time
and worked their asses off to make sure all went off without a hitch. But the
reward of helping our disabled veterans make the work all worth while!! To all
of those who joined our ‘party in the pasture’, I don’t think that any of
us could thank you enough for all of your support and dedication, and help in
keeping the rodeo a safe and awesome event. Oh yeah, and keeping the place clean
means alot, too. Couldn’t have survived the weekend without Captain Scotty and
Eileen, I think we would have starved to death without them. Captain Scotty, you
make the best damn ribs and sauce I have ever tasted, and Eileen you are always
there when we need ya, babe. Thanks!! Now if we could just keep the ‘Big Ragoo’
off the captain, then I think the bike games would go alot faster, but as
always, our Pirate and Turtle does a KICK ASS job and keeps it rollin’! Til
next time, Burn it til your back tire blows!! Gorrilla Joe and Chopper Chip
Chopper Nation
P.S. Chickman better keep that panunder lock and key, for it may be the next
victim of the bike-drop!
SMOKIN' AT THE RODEO Halloween 2008
So everyone HAS has to talk about the rodeo and all I can say is
DAMN!! Did you see the Fat Tire Boys and the rice burner in the burn-out pit?
Hell yeah!! My lil bro and Chopper Nation had to show the rest of you bikers how
it is done. Speaking of, did any of you see those sissy Old Skool Chopper boys
around? NO? Me neither. All I can figure is that it must’ve been cuz their
little wee’s wee’s were hurting!! But back to the rodeo.. There is no doubt
that we had a damn good time, as always! A special thank you goes out to J.O
Batten, of course. Because without him, there wouldn’t be a rodeo and we
wouldn’t be able to do all of this. But most of all, the biggest thank you
goes to our girl Kristy, who brought us Robert Morris, attorney at law, in which
fought, damn proudly four our right to party and proved that WE DO still have
rights. And to the staff. A big HELL YEAH to those who volunterred their time
and worked their asses off to make sure all went off without a hitch. But the
reward of helping our disabled veterans make the work all worth while!! To all
of those who joined our ‘party in the pasture’, I don’t think that any of
us could thank you enough for all of your support and dedication, and help in
keeping the rodeo a safe and awesome event. Oh yeah, and keeping the place clean
means alot, too. Couldn’t have survived the weekend without Captain Scotty and
Eileen, I think we would have starved to death without them. Captain Scotty, you
make the best damn ribs and sauce I have ever tasted, and Eileen you are always
there when we need ya, babe. Thanks!! Now if we could just keep the ‘Big Ragoo’
off the captain, then I think the bike games would go alot faster, but as
always, our Pirate and Turtle does a KICK ASS job and keeps it rollin’! Til
next time, Burn it til your back tire blows!! Gorrilla Joe and Chopper Chip
Chopper Nation
P.S. Chickenman better keep that pan under lock and key, for it may be the next
victim of the bike-drop!
IT WAS ON ! IN THE PASTURE JUNE 13th. As the crazy BASTIDS
from Scootergoods
and the Chopper Nation had some fun! MATTRESS RACIN'
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October 2008 September 2008 AUGUST 2008 |
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A word to Chopper Nation
Your May article talks about
real bikers are not to look like models in a catalog, but yet every time
I see one of them he looks like one of the Chip-n-dale dancers. I also
noticed one of those so called choppers came to the rodeo on a trailer.
It was like a princess on a float at a homecoming parade. It was called
" OLD SKOOL RODEO" not " NEW SKOOL FASHION SHOW".
Real choppers are built out of blood, sweat, and alot of beer not
bought. Don't get me wrong I like to look at the fancy paint, it's the
only way to tell them apart. My chopper is one of a kind, you might be
the Fat Tire Boys, but you should not be called Chopper Nation until you
build one from nothing.
NO SKOOL CHOPPERS
REBUTTAL
June 2008
May 2008 March 2008 The Original "FAT TIRE BOYS" February 2008 Yes they do! Choppers look cool,and the dudes that ride them do so for that exact reason. They to think they are cool. NO FRONT FENDER, NO WINDSHIELDS, NO BAGS. The only problem is it takes 4 or 5 support bikes for each one on a ride. Hey man? Can you carry my leathers cause it’s hot and I don’t have bags. Or let’s get beer and oysters but you will have to carry them for me. They talk schitt about SWINGARMS ARE FOR SISSY’S but are the only ones to complain their ass and back are hurting everytime we stop.Hell they have even asked us to carry a T-Back they just bought for their Ole Lady, cause they just ain’t got no room. Next they will be wanting us to carry their bitches cause P-Pads don’t look cool, and they don’t want to scratch their dam fender. So from now on all the Baggers will be hauling their crap plus cheese and crackers to go with them Chopper Riders Whine. "Gunslinger"
January 2008 December 2007 If your new to the chopper nation, having purchased or built your shiny new chariot there are a few chopper guy rules that apply to your new found lifestlye. First and most important is that helmets are a no no.They just plain look dumb and when you take them off you got helmet hair. Very uncool. P-pads and passenger seats are also no no’s If the bitch wants a ride that bad she can sit on the fender. A real biker woman wouldn’t mind anyway. She wouldunderstand and appreciate your sense of style. Your gonna have to leave allhat gear you carried around on your FLH, you cant be seen carrying anything more than a do rag. Deal with it. When it rains and everybody else is bundled up real nice in their rain gear and jackets your gonna look like a drowned rat. Hold your head high,your part of the chopper nation. Stop by the pharmacy on the way home and get some nyquil, you’ll be fine AND it’s a pretty good buzz. Chopper guys are minimalists at heart so winter is gonna be especially hard on you. No fluffy lined gloves for you my friend, how ya supposed to pick your nose at stoplights? Them winter boogers are large and nasty, when everybody else is taking off their warm sissy style gloves you’ll already be done picking and ready for that upcoming green light. The word "windshield" shall be forever banned from your vocabulary. A true chopper guy lives to feel the wind. "The Fat Tire Boys" It really doesn’t matter what brand of chopper your on, we’re all kindred spirits, a special breed of biker nobody understands but us. The men and women of CHOPPER NATION
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